Study Shows Humans Should Consume 6-8 Metric Tons of Water Per Day

A new study conducted by researchers at Johnson & Johnson recently found that the average American Human should be consuming at least six to eight metric tons of water every day (or about 12,000 lbs. for the common man). Head scientist of the study, Theo R.F. Switzickswalzakc, working entirely off of a hunch, was able…

Females Catching on to “Man Bun” Trend

Across America, even here at Champlain College, women are beginning to experiment with Man Buns. As of recent, girls throughout the nation have been growing their hair out and balling it all up at the top of their head in almost the exact same way as their male counterparts. In some cases, even if they have never…

ISIS Not Happy Over LEGO Movie Oscar Snub

The world’s most in-demand terrorist sensation ISIS is back in the news, stirring up some wacky red carpet drama! The group announced Thursday via hostage style GoToMeeting conference that they were distraught and appalled with the Academy’s choice to pass over The LEGO Movie for a Best Animated Picture nomination. In a statement, the group’s…

White Cops II

BigoTron Studios has done it again. After the disgustingly successful release of “White Cops I,” the gaming company based out of Birmingham is back in the news with a sequel that’ll leave you breathless. Since the release of White Cops II in August, the game has surged to the top of the charts, beating its…