Not every piece can have the pithy, down-to-earth, banal succor of an Odyssey Online article. Here’s some that didn’t make the cut. 

1. Date Rape: Pros and Cons
2. 10 Genital Deformities Required if You’re Going to Send Me Dick Pics
3. Reasons Ben Carson Should Be Your New Daddy
4. An Open Letter to My Chlamydia
5. 5 Ways Being Sexy is Different Than Having Daddy Issues
6. GIFs to Send Your Uncle to Tell Him When No Means No
7. I Fucked My 11th Grade Chemistry Teacher, and That’s OK
8. An Open Letter to My Prosthetic Limb
9. 6 Reasons I Am Terrible, Just Absolutely the Fucking Worst