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Harry Potter and Schrödinger’s Cat
When Harry Potter, the protagonist of J.K. Rowling’s magical fantasy series by the same name, suggests that his friend could be ‘bugged’ with a hidden microphone, she incredulously explains that, “All those substitutes for magic Muggles use — electricity, computers, and radar, and all those things — they all go haywire around Hogwarts; there’s too… Read more
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The True Nature of Underwear
“Dude, underwear is just so, like, oppressive. I don’t want that kind of shit.” Semi-dreads broke the pristine silence, shaking his friends out of their trances with his seemingly random sentiment. Small smiles crept onto their faces as they started to comprehend and reflect on what semi-dreads had said. They were sitting on the stone… Read more
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Homeless Chic
“Okay, can you, like, tell me if this sounds really shitty of me?” A twenty-something brunette in a sweater dress with a septum piercing and impressively curly hair turned toward her friend, a white faux-fur vest in hand. Her friend, another girl in a knit poncho-cardigan crossover with Aztec print looked up, concerned. “What?” Urban… Read more
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Getting Down With the Gulls
“Hey Vermont kid, are you okay?” Probably not. I was passed out in an unknown hallway with blood on my face, a dick drawn on my neck, and hazy memories of a 40 oz. bottle filled with what looked like Tide detergent floating through my head. It was the Sidewalk Slammer, the drink of… Read more
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The Great Perhaps
I’ve always been really fascinated with books. When I was little my parents would read me Curious George every night before bed, and I would always request the same story over and over, specifically the story of when George swallows a puzzle piece and has to go to the hospital. I think that was when… Read more
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From Inside My Cubical
I’m writing this while at my internship. Or my observation, rather. Either way, despite the title, I’m doing the same thing. I write a lot of news releases. Which is nice for my portfolio, but really bad for my sanity. Everyone left to go to lunch and I’m here writing this instead of the news release because… Read more
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